One of the many things I am grateful for, is the fact that every day, I have an opportunity to start over. While I’m not in control of what happens each day, I AM in control of my attitude. When life happens, or something catches me off-guard, I have the natural, sinful tendency to place myself in a rut. Or a pity party. Honestly, it can take months for me to get back on track. I know I need to cut that out, but for some reason, it likes to latch itself onto me. I feel that I have the right to be upset, to be angry or bitter, to be sad, anxious or depressed about it. But you know what? I’m commanded to rise above that by my Almighty Creator. I should not live as I did in my former days.
God says:
“ ‘In your anger do not sin’: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” (Ephesians 4:26)
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (Philippians 4:6)
“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:11)
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” (Ephesians 4:31)
And finally:
“You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” (Ephesians 4:22-24)
My mind is always at war. When I am knocked down, I have to immediately keep my eyes fixed on Jesus. I have to surround myself with positive messages to remind myself of God’s love. I’ve been listening to only Christian music for months now. Just a few weeks ago, I wrote a small note to place on my bathroom mirror to remind myself how to begin my morning – To start each day right, with my eyes fixed on Jesus and to remain in prayer, in faith. I NEED that reminder. It won’t come naturally. Even in the midst of surrounding myself with positive messages through song, reading God’s Word and writing, the negative thoughts which bring anger, anxiety, sadness and bitterness seems to still fill my mind overwhelmingly more than the positive thoughts. It seemed like I couldn’t escape the negative thinking and self-hatred.
I wrote this blog after meeting with a friend who told me the truth – which I knew was going to hurt, but I need to hear the truth. It helped give me the push to just start over. It all begins with the mind.
As I opened up my Bible to see what the Lord would reveal, it opened up to Psalms, and I read Psalms 96 and 98, which both begin with “sing to the Lord a new song.” The word “NEW” stood out to me and made me realize that I need to start over. Start new.
So I am committed from this day forward to start each day with a more intentional grateful, thankful attitude for not only God’s salvation, but for those He places in my life. I need to step out of my introverted zone, step out of my fear of large social settings, step out of my fear of being ridiculed, rejected and insulted, step out of the walls and barriers I placed between me and the rest of the world. More importantly, I need to prioritize loving myself, so I can love others better – especially my brothers and sisters in Christ.
I thank the Lord for giving me a second chance, day in and day out. I need to start taking that more seriously and live it out daily.
“Self-discipline begins with the mastery of your thoughts. If you don’t control what you think, you can’t control what you do. Simply, self-discipline enables you to think first and act afterward.”
– Napoleon Hill
Life's Journey 